Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Kareena Hijra Is My Name

breaking hearts
my notoriety to fame
they who use me
abuse me
I shame
roaring
libidinous lions
with my whip
I tame
yes I am heartless
avenging my gender
a street fighter
I became
a power
of passion
they cant shame
or blame
kareena karmic
vengeance
my name
I live for
the moment
the moment
lives for me
a hijra
without surname
a fire that
your crotchety
crotch
will inflame
an erupting
volcano
they proclaim
a hijra
who loves
to play games
accursed man
his accursed
manhood defame
I shoot to kill
when I aim
man his
machinations
I frame

This is an imaginary poem , but the words have lived their time I knew a young nubile hijra who was continuously abused by his maternal uncle and than eventually sold to a hijra brothel..she turned beautiful, so beautiful that a local Don kidnapped her but she unleashed her passion , he released her and she hates men uses them vindicating her stand against her lost childhood..

She was crying when she narrated me her story , and it was during Ramzan she was fasting keeping the sacred vows and edicts , she solicits after Idd..she told me.

She is a story of success and failure too..and her name is not Kareena at all.. she has flats in posh localities she has over 50 prostitutes working under her ..she could buy anything.. than she began crying again she cant buy her lost childhood and her lost dreams...and from beneath the pillow she pulled out a sepia toned picture much maligned picture of her sitting in a cut out of a Moon at the Haji Malang photostudio.. her parents had bought her there from a village in Maharashtra.

So my poem is the angst of a Hijras lost Illusions..

The Ultimate Hijra Goddess

118,176 items / 768,102 views

a world
divided
between
no and yes
laxmi narayan tripathi
the ultimate hijra goddess
god bless
a heart of gold
beneath
her ethnic dress
my soul loves
to caress
sit in a rickshah
at thane
they will take
you to her house
without asking you
her address
my hijra guru
my muse
this pilgrims
pedestrian poetic
progress
a story within a picture
a picture within a story
I digress
thank you laxmi
in your fold
you gave me access
for your abundant
love and largesse
your finery and finesse

Hijra Passion Unleashed

On 16 Feb 10, 4.18PM IST El said:

Congratulation of your very interesting pics
i love yours pics of hijra because this is my passion
i put some of them in my favoris
thanks my dear

This was a message sent to me by a Flickr contact.. I add it to poetry of sultry sensuality..

Hijra passion
unleashed
at haji malang
it rained money
they clapped
they danced
each other
they lovingly
teased
a moment
dying
in the embers of time
a moment like breeze
among
hijras such as these
lovers of Sufi shrines
tortured from
time immemorial
but lovers of peace
asking
for forgiveness
on bent knees
born as men
but the soul of a woman
they select to copy and freeze
these androgynous
beauties of haji malang
that the world envies

I Shoot Pain

118,151 items / 768,050 views

I shoot pain even
when it shows me
a smiling face
hijra ethnicity
hijra race
a fire
a burning pyre
they embrace
selling
their bodies
dancing
begging
down the hierarchy
an ancestry trace
the government
has yet to give
them their rightful place
a draconian law
article 377
their human soul
debase
to sodomize
their freedom
just in case
they dont mend
their ways
acid rain
purple haze

Her Name Is Kareena Hijra

118,151 items / 768,050 views

She is a transgender
her soul
to an androgynous god
she surrendered
dancing on the pyre
of her remorse
her inner self
she plundered
her name is
kareena hijra
a paigham of peace
a farman of hope
through her
dancing feet
she rendered

The Hijda Heavenly High

wingless
she learns to fly
hijra do or die
a teardrop
within a cry
androgynous
pain
no wealth
can buy
lost illusions
on lifes
clothes line
hung to dry
the hijra
heavenly high
a testicular tragedy
a solemn sigh
made in india
born in mumbai
a world of despair
hidden as a pearl
in the hijra eye
a wild orchid
a flower in bloom
a hopeless cacti

The Hijra Beauty Queen

always evergreen
on the other side
of a fence
the ass is
always green
the hijra beauty
queen
a tragedy
unforeseen
dichotomy of fate
engendered
no support to lean
dancing away
her woes
at hajimalang
she was seen
all of seventeen
fit for a debut
on a bollywood screen
thoda meetha
thoda namkeen
neither man nor woman
a hijra in between

The Hijra Reflects

her life
her struggle
cause and effects
born man
a woman
the hijra reflects
the art of living she
poetically perfects
overcoming flaw
bodily defects
a picture of pain
body and text
you see
but cannot
detect
hijra life
a reality
a posthumous
pretext

Haji Malang the Hijra Paradise

Year after year despite all odds I come to Haji Malang Kalyan , I climb a mountain bare feet , when I say climb , I dont merely walk, I take a rough path, my feet diabetic by nature bleed , but I move ahead what I shoot on this path I include as street photography.. the unending street of Life.

As a photographer I have miles to go, as technology keeps changing I shoot with a single camera Nikon D80 though my mentor Dr Glenn Losack MD has sent me another D80 body, I dont envy the sizzling equipment that other photographers possess.. because the greatest instrument is the camera of the mind ..pictures come you dont need to go to the mountains sometimes the mountain comes to the photographer too.

Earlier photographers from big camera clubs looked at me with disdain as I called myself a photo blogger ..Fuck I gave free what they sold as commerce , this is what hurt the Marwari stock library man too..but who cares philanthropy is sharing ones culture and I have done just that for over 5 years on the Internet.

I dont begrudge photographers who make money it is their prerogative I chose Photography as a means to attain peace and holistically use it as a medium of Healing..I need money badly , to cover my rising liabilities but I try to make it through my only source of income- Tailoring clothes.


I shoot shit literally ..you see it as pictures on the viewfinder of your mind.. why I shoot shit is a question for me and my mind only. I am not into Fuck F stops and nor into Fuck Vision or Fuck anything else..

I shoot because God had been kind to me , I show you his world and how unkind we are to God most of the time..

I once shot beggar Muslim women I could undrape their pain from the hijab on their faces of course such was the power of my minds lens , but now I am tired , nothing can change the regressive Muslim world.. Screw Human rights the rights of a women is a totally neglected feature I see around me, I talk about my surroundings and not your petro dollar littered back yard....


I shot their depressing state but it gets more depressing day by day..and than I wonder that the hijra wants to be nothing but a woman ..yes I shoot Hijras and show you their positive karma..I find hijras more at home with the reality of their godforsaken lives they rise , they get rich but it is through their struggle only and not because of mainstream society..

Now I will tell you I met a very rich man retired he has taken Fakiri, but wants to bed a hijra so he whispered this in my ears and I just kept quiet..I dont condemn or pre judge..its his choice..but I cant pimp for his obsession , that is why I deleted a lot of Facebook contacts kept my chat offline ..
At Flickr I dont add people who maybe trans gender and are into pon groups or have naked pictures as favorites I am not interested in seeing how endowed you are I dont need to re act like Sharukh Khan. and the print out of his Xrayed body part .

Sexuality as charter is what you are in the dark..

I will now give you a Facebook dialogue between me and a person who sent me a message I did tell him I would blog his messages ..they touched me a lot and I like to share it with all of you..

Lets call him B

His message
February 12 at 3:49am
I really like your great work for Hijdas, I highly appreciate it, These are one of the most neglected people in our society. i am the admirer of hijdas so I am sending you a friend request. I hope you will make your friend at face Book. thanks

Me

Firoze Shakir February 12 at 7:17am
thanks i will , but hijras is not the only thing that makes up my life ...

B
February 12 at 5:04pm
I know you are a religious shia, who perform matam and all those things. Plus you have covered soofisim also through different shrines. Not only this you also covered other religions like Hindusisim and Christianity. But my point is to my knowledge no other professional photographer give importance to the most neglected community Hijras. As I am from Pakistan, they are really in miserable condition. To my observation Hijras in India are in better condition than in Pakistan, maybe i am wrong also.
Wish you all the best for your all good work.
Take care

Me
thank you wish you well
take care
might use your words without your name on my post..

B
Sure plz as you feel comfortable
Wish you all the best

Me

Firoze Shakir February 12 at 9:03pm
thanks

B
You are very welcome. Whenever you visit San Francisco in USA. Please let me know. I like to meet you.
Take care


Firoze Shakir February 13 at 12:22am
dont think it will ever happen entrenched in mumbai but happy where i am //

So now you know what a photo blog can do to two souls millions of miles away..though I know wife thinks if my blogs bought in money she would be more amiable kind than she normally is..and my spots my stripes are at war with my restless soul..

Beauty Lies In The Eyes of the Beloved

118,009 items / 767,257 views

I could never stop shooting her, I paid tribute to her spirit of survival in a world inhabited by wolves , she was vulnerable and fragile.. she hardly spoke her silence was the bedrock of her grace her dignity and her personality..yes I present you Khushi Hijra from Mumbai..

god tried
but the third gender
he failed to make
but man created the hijra
from his broken rib
for humanity's sake
two parallel lines
yet another line
its existence staked
a thought even
the draconian
article 377
could not forsake
the hijra soul
with demonic power
it did try to break
lusterless lyrics
tears keeping
the hijra awake
dancing
on the soul of love
like a writhing
dying snake
slithering silence
some heart ache
by not creating the hijra
god did not
make a mistake
he created man woman
tired he took a break
the hijra
real unreal or fake
a rose is a rose
is a rose
hijra for namesake
haji malang beckons
summer time
snowflakes

dedicated to my guru laxmi narayan tripathi..

Simran Dancer

Simran Dancer is an Indian trans gender we first met at a private party of a close friend ..we lost touch, and than we met again while I was coming down to Mumbai from Ajmer , we became good friends.

On reaching Mumbai she invited me to her birthday party , at Madh Islands I presented her a string of turquoise and I never knew that blue enhances her personality..

Than we kept meeting at Haji Malang , this trip she had found her dreams , she was very happy, and had come to terms with her life.

Simran dancer is a very beautiful person ,a friend to love and cherish,she is there for you, at your time of need..this is what I gathered from my Sufi instincts..

On this same post I had written some glorious text about her all disappeared this is a new problem plaguing my blogs at Flickr and my uploader crashed once again..while I slept..

If a photographer cannot upload his pictures how does he blog..and I doubt the Flickr developer or You Telecom my internet provider will ever answer this..I pay You Telecom Rs 857 per month for a service that sucks and is unsatisfactory in spite of all their efforts.

My pro membership to Flickr for two years was paid by my mentor Dr Glenn Losack MD..I dont use my blogs my pictures or my pedestrian poems as a second source of income so it hits me hard in the guts and my pockets.

Facebook where I post some of my stuff does not have Blogr stats so I dont know how my people view my pictures , but at Flickr the source of all my blogs the daily views is 9000 per day..and this I confess in sheer humility,and it is not my Shia pictures , or my Hindu related stuff or my street pictures they come to see it is purely the hija ethos that gets the maximum blog traffic.

I dont pimp my pictures at Alpha Inventions or Condrun.. I did use them when I started out with great success.. nothing personal.


Pictures any one can shoot , but you must be destined to find Hijras and they should be willing to be shot by you , and so I am lucky to have the blessings of my Guru Laxmi Narayan Tripathi..

She has helped me much her name opens doors and she knows I dont do this for money or fame.. I am a person who has decided to take up Fakiri in later life , renouncing material life forever..once I have paid back my liabilities..

I will give this a shot before I take samadhi.. I do not wish to be buried in a Muslim cemetery for sure.. my body parts I shall donate to Medicine.

Now it really does not matter if you call me a Muslim or call me a Hindu..just read me as a human being is more than enough for me..


I dedicate this blog , my dark thoughts to the soul of a doyen of photography AL Syed of Palanpur who shot some memorable pictures including Indian Cinema , but before his death took up Fakiri.. and came to terms with life and after life..

I bought his book with an introduction by OP Shrama from the streets at Chor Bazar and made it the epilogue of my own life too.

The Ultimate Hijra Experience

Yes in all humility
I shoot Hijras as a poet...
the inimitable
hija blogger
on the internet
the ultimate hijra
experience
as your gonads sweat
you have it you or
you dont have it yet
at haji malang
the hijras jab we met
surrounded by
studs hulks
toy boys hijra pets
lecherously
masturbating moments
of men as beautiful
as women
endowed without
padded chests
my hijra poetry
like eggs in
a cuckoos nest
hijra beauties
riding on the crest
ethnicity
originality
you wont find
among decaying
decrepit demystifying
transgenders
of the west

You Telecom Has Turned its Back On Me

My uploading and my browsing is at its worst today, my uploader has crashed over 8 times ..

I went to their Bandra office today but it is the same story day in and day out..'


My message to You Telecom sent today..

Sir your Service is the Worst Today - Urgent

I tried to call Mr Navin Singh on the number I have , I also visited your Bandra office spoke to Mr Umesh, he at least agreed there is a problem at your end , today the uploader has crashed 8 times page does not open , there is a serious connectivity problem I keep telling you but you dont seem to pay heed to my complaint nor have you seriously tried to rectify it, I am not crying Wolf but I am really fed up, visits of your technicians has not helped either..

I am really disappointed I can imagine the pain of the common man subscribing to your service, at least I blog my pain..and yet Help from your end is a million light years away..

Leaving aside Mr Navin Singh nobody has ever tried to address my problem goiing on for several weeks

As Ever
Firoze Shakir .
237303

You Telecom Has Turned its Back On Me

My uploading and my browsing is at its worst today, my uploader has crashed over 8 times ..

I went to their Bandra office today but it is the same story day in and day out..'


My message to You Telecom sent today..

Sir your Service is the Worst Today - Urgent

I tried to call Mr Navin Singh on the number I have , I also visited your Bandra office spoke to Mr Umesh, he at least agreed there is a problem at your end , today the uploader has crashed 8 times page does not open , there is a serious connectivity problem I keep telling you but you dont seem to pay heed to my complaint nor have you seriously tried to rectify it, I am not crying Wolf but I am really fed up, visits of your technicians has not helped either..

I am really disappointed I can imagine the pain of the common man subscribing to your service, at least I blog my pain..and yet Help from your end is a million light years away..

Leaving aside Mr Navin Singh nobody has ever tried to address my problem goiing on for several weeks

As Ever
Firoze Shakir .
237303

Pyar Kiya To Darna Kiya

held in the comfort
of his arms
beneath the chunri
hidden from view
lies the man
of her dreams
the hijra world
watching passion
entwined love
suddenly
begins to scream
the hijra world
is in throes
no more
what it seems
men sweating
crotchy seams
voyeuristic rituals
the hijra soul
redeems
oh to be a hijra
says to me a nubile
lad
fuck the world
mainstream
pyar kiya to darna kiya
love gushing erotically
through his androgynous
bloodstream
from the corner of his eyes
the bigot religiously
blasphemes
but the hijra in hijraland
continues with his
daydreams
the hijra soul supreme
woeful much maligned ethnicity
working as a team


dedicated to the goddess hidden from public view
but the queen of my hijra photostream

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