Wednesday, March 16, 2011

My Hand Wrote The Poetry of Hijra Pain

172,655 items / 1,345,557 views

my hand
is nothing
but a illusion
a deceptive tool
its my soul
her soul
all rules
my childish brain
of all its frivolity
the streets of pain
my only school
my angst
my raw emotions
super cool
the flesh was willing
the spirit was weak
as the poet drooled
cosmic consciousness
seeking freedom
from the spool
as i was caught
in the vortex
of her loves
drowning pool

When Old Age Catches Up With The Hijra

176,148 items / 1,376,192 views

a catastrophe
a painful journey
down memory lane
lovers lost
pride prejudice
eternal pain
all in vain
a solitary
over her
lost domain
new nubile
more sexier
hot hijras
metro sexual
net savvy
when old age
up with the hijra
a lingering sorrow
is what remains
her aging soul
bound captive
in molten
burning chains
time and tide
wont wait
for the hijra
she must
live suffer
fuck dont

Hijras Are Human Knocking At Societys Door

176,148 items / 1,376,178 views

to be let in
as human
as they are human
on every score
the untouchable
social scums
a bleeding sore
blood sweat tears
on the mound
of despair
forced to beg
dance even whore
live on the outskirts
behind shut doors
like sex slaves
doing sexual chores
beaten brutalized
raped sodomized
as the human soul
dignity honor
self respect
of the hijras
who will restore
hijras are broken
dolls fuck forget
carry on as before
hijas love hate
dislike abhor
whether you
their sufferings
their eternal pain
i am not so sure

Baby Hijra Guru No1

176,148 items / 1,375,618 views

It was Baby chela of Ma Madhurima of Park Site Vikhroli who was in charge of the events at the All India Hijda Sammelan gathering of Hijras and their fashion week and fashion show.

It was late Ragini Nayak who granted me permission to shoot the fashion show thanks to social activist Mr Santosh Shetty a dear friend , we were just two photographers at that time me and Nitin Sonawane of Times Group.

Baby Hijra Guru did not take kindly to us , but later she had a chang of heart and I met her the following day by that time she had Hijda Searched me my background my status and my motive for shooting hijras.

Hijra Search is a more powerful engine than Google Search..

The hijras without the Internet come to know where a child is born and if it is a eunuch child they take custody of it as their own.. this is what I was told.

Baby came to know of my connection with Laxmi Narayan Tripathi from Thane those days Laxmi was not my guru.. I was new to photography and hijra photography too.

Laxmi and I were old friends through Bollywood .

Baby was hospitable I had lunch with her and we became good friends for life , we keopt on meeting at the various venues dargah circuits of Haji Malang and Ajmer Sharif,than I shot the 40 th day of Late Ragini Nayaks memory service all the hijras from all over India were at Park Site Vikhroli.. to mourn the passing away of this larger than life Hijra personality and cult figure.

I was invited here by Heena Hijra.

And today in retrospection without Ma Madhurima and Baby Guru I would have never come this far in documenting the Hijra angst neither for money nor for gain this is my own personal contribution to the Hijras without the aid of Microsoft Foundation ....and I am mere a speck of dust compared to Mr Salman Rushdie.

I have shot the hijra pride , the hijra resurgence and the ancestral hijra spirit that survives at all cost.. hijra population does not depend on reproduction unlike mans the hijra is born through the soul of sorrow and pain.

These are old images all housed at I am spring cleaning as I have removed my Hijdaeunuchblogs@Wordpress from public view forever...

Wordpress is not the right place for me to document the soul of humanity... is my new belief thanks to the bitter experience I have had there.

All my sites I have disabled the comment box as I am not a hijra activist , I am not a Hijra counselor I am a poet a photographer who blogs nothing more nothing less.

Those that have gender problems queries questions should forward them to the appropriate agency or NGO .. I got tired of saying this even to kids as old as 16 years who wanted information how to become hijras.. And I would simply block them at Flickr or block them at Facebook.

I still get messages but I merely ignore all such weird requests...

And in all sincerity I have bought the hijra home on your computer as a human being seeking help rehabilitation in society this is my message my primary photographic agenda.

And this was some thing I could not tell bigots in my own Shia community too...and bigots in other communities too.

Uske Pas Husn Hai Mere Pas Nazakat Hai

176,148 items / 1,375,570 views

she was dark
as dark
as midnight
but she did not envy
the wheatish colored hijra
voluptuous nubile
gorgeous delight
dark though she was
she was sweetish all right
dreaming of a prince
charming her dreams
in mid flight
her dreams out of sight
lead kindly light
black is beautiful
though white is just white
the hijras collectively
born out of sorrow
a dead tomorrow
a fall from a height
shadows and fright
poetic plight
castrated chaos
karmic pain
the hijra heritage
hijra birthright

These are old pictures I have Poetized

Jab Hijde Ko Gussa Ata Hai

176,148 items / 1,375,539 views

woh khamakha
jaldi bhadak jata hai
kya kya keh jata hai
galiyan de jata hai
taliyan bajata hai
sari uthata hai
ek pahelu dikhata hai
ma bahen kar jata hai
jab hijde ko gussa ata hai
teri maki teri bahen ki
sunata hai lal lal tamatar ki tarah
ghurghurata hai tilmilata hai
raste par majma ekatha kar ke
woh khoob itrata hai
thodi der ke bad thanda ho jata hai
purani batein bhool kar
phir gale se lagata hai
irani hotel par le jakar
pani kam chai pilata hai
brun maska khilata hai
hath main dus rupaye
bhi thamata hai
ek bhikari shayar
ko bus ka bhada dilwata hai
aur dubara milneka
wada bhool jata hai

Perhaps I imagine too much but while going to Ratlam on a pilgrimage a hijra spotted me sitting on the floor , I had a valid ticket but no seat she immediately offered me tea biscuits and than asked me if I needed any money or further help.. she touched my feet kissed my hand and got off at Glubarga.. a spiritual destination of God for the hijras too..

Collected Information About the Eunuchs of India Known as Hijras

Hijra means "impotent one" in Urdu. In Hindi, hijra may be spelled hijada, hijara, hijda, hijira, or hijrah, and is pronounced somewhere between "heejra" and "heejda". An older, more respectable term for hijra is kinnar. An abusive slang Hindi term for hijra is chakka.
Some hijras were made to be literal eunuchs -- some of them against their will. The process isn't ordinarily a pretty one, usually carried out without the aid of modern anesthesia or antibiotics. Most, however, are transgender of some sort and choose to foreswear their lives as men while retaining their sex organs. A few, however, are intersex and are considered to be "born eunuchs." Hijras are usually considered to constitute a third sex or third gender in that they are neither men nor women. (Not coincidentally, both hijras and two-spirits -- Native American "Indians" who are also of a third gender -- have been said to refer to themselves as "not men, not women.") Hijras don't all look at themselves the same way. Some see themselves -- or are construed by others -- as females, feminine males, transsexuals, or androgynes. There are also female hijra, called hijrin, which are not the same as sadhin.

The term mukhanni may or may not be a synonym for hijra. Another such term is ali. The relatively new (as of 2003) Aravani (aka aravanni, aravani, or aruvani), originated in Tamil Nadu, was popularized in India as a politically correct term to describe members of the third gender, yet it applies more to the devotees of Kutandavar Aravan (India's god of the ali) than those of Bahuchara Mata (the goddess of the hijras). In Urdu and Punjabi, both in Pakistan and India, the term khusra is sometimes used. The Urdu term moorat -- a contraction of mard (man) and aurat (woman) -- is often used in Pakistan. In Gujarati, they are called Pavaiyaa. Another term is jankha.
The term koti (aka kothi) refers to males who take a "receptive" or feminine role in sex. They are usually not conflated with hijras, although they often dress as women and act in a feminine manner.
The word "hijra" has another, wholly unrelated meaning in another context: in Arabic, "Hijra" (aka Hegira) means "Migration," and is used in reference to various historic travels, such as the prophet Muhammad's journey from Mecca to Medina in 622 CE to set up the first Islamic state.
An all-around introductory explanation of hijras is stored on this very site, here. If you are reading this and have information which you feel might be helpful to this site, please send an e-mail message to .
This page is linked to the Androgyne Online website because hijras have some things in common with androgynes -- like being of a third gender, for example.

There is also the term jogappa (or joggapa).
According to the fourth footnote at the bottom of the article, "Confessions of a Tantric Androgyne," by Ganapati Sivananda Durgadas, at the now-defunct Anything That Moves site, hijra is a Persian-influenced North Indian term, while joggapa is the South Indian languages' equivalent. Durgadas says that joggapa are priestly in vocation and predominantly transvestitic, while the hijra lean towards the transsexual side and labor in various vocations. Another writer, Walter Penrose, says that the jogappa are followers of Yellamma, "a goddess of skin disease who is believed to have the power to change the sex of individuals." According to Amara Dasa, the jogappa "do not practice castration."

kind courtesy

The Buxom Hijra Beauty

176,148 items / 1,375,374 views

god was
he was kind
he gave
the hijra
an open mind
born a man
the hijra
a concept
of two souls
in a single
he defined
spirit and flesh
he combined
ying and yang
he aligned
prose poetry
passion pathos
he entwined
but sadly
the hijra
used abused
raped sodomized
by the so called
of mankind
the hijra
on the soul
of humanity
targeted by
hate as
an untouchable
by society
his fate outlined
the religious bigot
the god man
with daggers drawn
to hell confined
the hijra is human
do i need to remind
through my blogs
my poetry his pain

The Hijra In A Swoon

176,148 items / 1,374,779 views

born a male
she asked
god almighty
a boon
to make
her a desirable
woman very soon
now the hijra
over the moon
a clarie de la lune
darkness at dawn
midnight at noon
her flesh was willing
her spirit immune
the hijra lyrical tune
to the ravages of time
she was immune
pursued by
the politician
the film star
the man in khaki
the evasive tycoon
she had them all
under her thumb
including the local buffoon
beneath her windows
love songs he would croon
pitter patter of the raindrops
mumbai melodramatic monsoon
her long list of admirers
from dehradun to rangoon
flowers on her path strewn
a monsoon lover
dressed in maroon
misty eyed june
a forbidden love
stronger than
a Burmese typhoon
born from the soul
of an androgynous cocoon
a pearl held in the mouth
of an oyster in a blue lagoon

main hoon na yeh main kaise kahoon

Welcome To My Parlor Said The Hijra To The Fly

176,148 items / 1,374,750 views

feel the pleasures
of the flesh
once before you die
open yourself up
you smart ass guy
come in the darkness
of the night give
hope a chance
before your hopes dry
as i slither over
your lifeless body
make you joyously cry
your inner depth
your dark desires i pry
a forbidden fruit
i offer you on the sly
welcome to my parlor
said the hijra to the fly

Hijra Fashion Week - Hijra Super Models

Hijra Super Models Hijra Fashion Week

Hijra Super Models Hijra Fashion Week

Hijra Super Models Hijra Fashion Week

The Hijra Fashion Week All India Hijda Sammelan Mumbai

The Hijra Fashion Week All India Hijda Sammelan Mumbai

The Hijra Fashion Week All India Hijda Sammelan Mumbai

My Mother Is The Best Says Mona The Child Eunuch

176,148 items / 1,374,721 views

I really dont know the actual string of events but I was told that the night Mona was born a eunuch child she was handed over to the hijras.

And I never was curious to really know the truth of Monas birth , I shoot pictures I shoot pain I shoot life I dont prod people with details of their past.

I am not a story teller per se.

And so many years have passed since I met Mona her mother Babita the hijra beauty in the white dress and her foster father Gopal Haji, but I maintain a sense of decorum , one thing I know I wont ever publish a coffee table book, coffee table books are for the fucked rich and the lazy..

I also know I wont ever be printed as a book of poems leave aside hijra poetry.. so I shoot pictures because I have poetic access to these people , there is no other agenda or gainful purpose or motivation.

I am an incorrigible unforgiving fucked street photographer.

My pictures have come the hard way it was not easy and the senior hijras dont like pesky photographers dressed as sadhus , my normal dress code that luckily has now turned black with old age ...

These are old pictures I shot of the Hijra fashion week at the All India Hijda Sammelan and they were all shot in one single day in a few hours I am fucked trigger happy photographer I dont wait for future opportunities I dont believe in tomorrow so I shoot hijras.. and I doubt if the hijra believes in tomorrows.

Here Mona the eunuch was shooting his Hijra mother with a point and shoot Kodak.

Every year I meet Mona and her family twice a year once at Haji Malang and the next venue Ajmer Sharif.

Monas father Gopal Haji has invited to me many a hijra sammelans but the nature of my profession prevents me from going and photography poetry or blogging is not my profession.

I politely refuse.. I shoot when I do get an opportunity nothing more nothing less.

And luckily the only time I dont need my pseudo Press Card is when I shoot hijras ..though I have a valid Press Card of Bandra Times a local paper of Mr Clarence Gomes my patron saint and benefactor.

And these are old blank posts that I am adding text updating as you cal it bringing them forward on my Flickr changing the Exif Data.. of the actual day I posted this picture to the current one.

I learnt this trick from my cousin Glenn Losack..

The Hijra's Eternal Pain

176,148 items / 1,374,647 views

hijra beauty
has a short
shelf life
will soon
out of
a flesh
of clay
the hijra
was made
with light
some shade
a sword of Damocles
a sword of Aids
a forbidden fruit
the lord forbade
the hijra a commodity
bought sold in trade
pain pathos passion
in laid as she jades
her bosom
her rosy cheeks
time stealthily raids
hijras are human
a poetic thought
society degrades

Dying Standing

176,148 items / 1,374,634 views

in life
in death
the hijras
his last breath
the pain
the passion
of lady Macbeth
dreamless destiny
violent death