Tuesday, April 20, 2010

What Is Pain !

Sometimes I am fed up of this miserable life on earth , you are not governed by the good deeds you do, your life is hyped for all the wrong reasons , for me at the age of 57 life is watching a fucked movie in a fucked cinema hall, the usher giving head to guy a few seats away from me, this is life as I see it through the viewfinder of my fucked soul.

I shoot pain , even if it conceals itself behind a pretentious smile, I shoot pain all the time and it shoots me too with a greater intensity and velocity.

As a photographer I shot this little kid totally in awe of me as I am in awe of him , he is a giant I am a dwarf our roles reversed..Yes shooting kids is nothing but shooting the softer side of God..his harsher side is when I shoot beggars and the scums on the road..

My quintessential angst is supported on the crippled legs of pain , and pain keeps me going..to kill my self would take a brief second but to die would take me a life time.. Read it the way you like it there is nothing cryptic to the morbidity of my soul..

And than I shiver when someone asks another photographer what lens do you use.. this is life boxed in within life.

Photography makes you a philosopher though you may have not read Nietzsche at all, photography is poetry without words , words drain the soul..but images keep it whole

And long after I shot this picture I kept thinking about the look on this childs face I closed my eyes and realized he was aping my own fear , my own confusion my own anguish..

Yes he had shot me perfectly the way I am.. my iner being if it had a face it would like identical to the face of this child...

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