Friday, April 8, 2011

The Smaller The Better - Tadgolas

The Smaller The Better - Tadgolas

Duriyan... Majburiyan

179,214 items / 1,409,749 views


khab ate hain soke
uth jate hain roke
kambakht zindagi
aur ishq
main sirf dhoke hi dhoke
hawa ke jhoke hi jhoke..
mudaddi lakh bura chaye
khuda roke na roke
atma toke na toke

inspired by a dream in an inbox

The Barber Shot By Marziya Shakir 3 year old

179,214 items / 1,409,739 views

I made her stand on an empty chair next to the barber of Chinchpokli Road Bandra.

The Cobbler Shot By Marziya Shakir 3 year old

मी मराठी Shot by Marziya Shakir 3 year old

We Only Bow To God

179,210 items / 1,409,470 views

we only bow to god
not to king khalifa
or the saudi terrorist
troops in bahrain
their human cry
their human pain
funeral march
of syed hameed
syed mahfood
martyred
as thy shoot
blow your brains



media wont shed
tears for bahrain
its all about
profit and gain

yazidi
wahabbi
imperialistic
hegemony
trying
to overpower
the people
of bahrain
behind them
leading them
to battle
72 warriors
the supremacy
of hussain

labaik
labaik
ya hussain
ya hussain

justice
truth
liberty
equality
in rusty
chains
peoples will
trampled
by a spineless
ruler
of bahrain

ya hussain
ya hussain
ya hussain

Marziya Shoots a Headless Man

179,209 items / 1,409,421 views

This was tough aiming upwards to get the barber and the guy in the same frame specially if you are as small as Marziya Shakir 3 and a half years old, than she asked me to make her stand on an empty chair took the next shot.

Marziya shoots what I shoot but Marziya shoots them as more resounding poetry of life ..

Kya Woh Bhi Christian Hai?

179,208 items / 1,409,416 views

And this was the second shot of Marziya Shakir , and this is a lane crowded as ever in the evenings , with traffic from both sides heading towards Bandra Bazar or Chinchpokli Road Bandra.

And when I have nothing to shoot I shoot the pain and the last testament of Jesus Christ on the roads ..Marziya shoots the same testament too.. but hers is much more newer than mine..and I hope a Shia does not have to say out of turn Kya Woh Bhi Christian Hai..

Jee Han Woh Bhi Christian Hai..Meri Tarah..

Jesus Under The Skies Shot By Marziya Shakir Photographerno1

179,207 items / 1,409,410 views

I have shot this place where Jesus watches people go by a thousand times but Marziya shot the decisive moment taking Jesus by surprise.

I thought she might have not shot it right I asked her to take another shot..the next one..

Marziya is actually 3 and a half years old street photographer who teaches her grand father to unlearn photography.

Marziya Shakir Photographerno1 - 3 Year Old

179,206 items / 1,409,403 views

When I gave Marziya my camera to shoot Sakshi the girl in the pink dress they all laughed but the moment Marziya raised the lens upwards and lit the flash on their faces they all looked at her in sheer surprise.


Marziya is good but is getter better every day, she is confident , the weight of the camera and swinging the lens upwards does not really bother her she shoots vertical frames too, but shooting the Nikon D80 is child's play , what matters is looking at the image on the camera back.. which is what Marziya does after every frame she shoots.

Last evening was Marziyas day out with the camera she shot my barber I also made her stand on the vacant chair to shoot him, this is the birth of Marziya Shakir Photographerno1.

Thirsting For Her Lips

179,205 items / 1,409,376 views

she is
my muse
an apparition
into my dreams
night after night
she slips
wet moist
she drips
this poets soul
with a frenzy
of sweet
delusions
doomed
desires
she whips
she could
balance
a wine glass
on her hips
a molten
heart beat
calculatingly
combustible
as it skips
oceans
of fancy
within
two parallel lines
my soul
on a cataclysmic
cybernetic trip
platonic
catatonic
ironic
my inner soul
she strips
drenched
to the bone
a bond
a new
friendship
my pain
my struggle
my headships
her thoughts
soak
my being
i am
not who i am
totally eclipsed
by her moods
her temperamental
emotional swings
whizzing dizzying
going round
round the mound
of he cosmic ring
a poet merely
a puppet
on her string



i have used this picture for representational purposes as i still have to shoot the picture of her pouted lips as i am merely a blank space seeking hope on her unwritten script ..sir a haunted silence a million times echoes what is love or courtship.. cupids arrow zooms and zips...i take a bow your ladyship..

Walking Barefeet With The Palki of Sai Baba of Shirdi on Gudi Padwa

179,205 items / 1,409,079 views

I shot her on the day after Gudi Padwa and thought she had walked with the Gudi Padwa Jari Mari procession , butt I was wrong my humble apologies ..

She walked barefeet from Dada with the Palki of Sai Baba till Vikhroli and because she was in bad shape they did not allow her to complete the entire barefeet trip to Shirdi for celebrations of Ram Navmi.. to be held there.

When I took this picture I shot her without her face she works near my workplace.. her feet are much better now I was told.

Rashid Bawa And The Hijra Damsel

Megha Hijra Beauty and Sada Suhagin

Megha Hijra Beauty and Sada Suhagin

179,205 items / 1,409,005 views''

I know this shot has excited the SadaSuhagin bawa but you would be excited to if Megha held you this way.


Megha is an upcoming Hijra actress waiting fr a release of her film in Bollywood.

She is a fabulous dancer and a great loving human being..I could have gone on shooting her I have never bonded with any hijra as much as her perhaps Khushi .. these two hijra ladies are paragons of beauty and it is a pleasure shooting them for posterity.

Khushi called me a few days back she was in Bandra but we could not meet my luck was bad.. and she wants Marziya my 3 year old grand daughter to shoot her..

Marziya shot a lot of pictures this evening on the streets today.

Sada Suhagin And Me

179,205 items / 1,408,987 views

You hardly see this ethnicity at the dargahs these days they are spiritual cross dressers married to God , but they have wives children too, this bawa has 9 children and he has done kar seva at the Golden Temple he has been to Tirupati and all the major Shrines of India.

He believes in all religiosity known Hindu Sanskrit sholkas and he is an exorcist too.. a shaman.

It is the third time in almost 10 years I met a Sada Suhagin this close , he is like the Ardh Nari Nareshwars.

Neetu Hijra The Entrepreuner Hijra of Delhi

179,205 items / 1,408,962 views



I met Neetu many years back with young horny studs or toy boys as they are called in Hijra parlance she was at Char Yar smoking the chillum , I took her pictures she is self dependent she has a transport business a PCO booth and a few rickshahs and tempos thats what she told me..

She wore only white and than I met har in 2010 wit the hijra bawas white had given away to pastels and she looked more cheerful..she remembered me alright..

And these are the patrons of the Hijra Bawas taking care of the bawas needs.

The Chillum An Instrument Of Universal Peace For The Bawas

179,205 items / 1,408,876 views

I dont smoke but I did many years back during my short lived college days and during my days at the archives dungeon like corridors of Elphinstone College ,where it was a 14 goli chillum and Afghani instead of Bombay black thanks to Pathan friends that got the stuff those days from Kabul.

I gave up smoking after marriage and never touched the chillum or the reefer ever again .. and bawas smoke they are not at all into alcohol, they take afeem cocaine ganja and they always have the best stuff thanks to the mafioso as their patrons and drug dealers and peddlers too.

The hijra bawas smoke too but not as heavily as their male bawa counterparts.. and Char Yar you will find losers drug addicts and the Urus circuit keeps their addiction alive though they are living dead .. zombie like , and the intrusion of photographers on their private space makes them very wild and violent.

But yes if the photographer smoked with them they would not mind even if he paid for their addiction I dont.. so I was always facing their ire in one form or the other but I also carried a huge stick called the Asa made of wood and silver and had used it on one or two crazy bawas .

Once at Mahim during Baba Fakhrs Urus , this you might not believe a crazy bawa slashed my stomach with a sword , but nothing happened he just cut the outer layer of my jacket .. but than later cried hugged me and became my soul brother for life.

I have not seen him for a long time and if I do see him I would run the marathon for sure.

There are crazy guys you meet and Char Yar is an amazing place believe me God and my Nikon D 80 protects me from danger of all kinds natural super natural.

The Hijra Murid of the Hijra Bawas Char Yar Ajmer

The Chancawalli Rafaees And The Hijra Murids

179,205 items / 1,408,853 views

This is the Rafaee or body piercing Sufi mendicants of Chancawalli associated with the Sufi Chishtiya order , they beg fir a living and I have been a part of this group for about 10 years now I have seen its rise I have sen its fall, I was thrwn out of this group for a year due to a misunderstanding between their earlier Peer Sikandar Wali Baba but soon after his death I was called back by his successor Handi , but Handi died too overdose and drugs , than his place was taken by Barsati Bawa with the Rajasthani turban my very dear friend and well wisher, but he too has been replaced and this group now is merely a splinter of what it really was.

I shot this at Ajmer in 2009 and hijras are patrons of the bawas or their murids they give them money drugs etc.. and the bawas bless them in exchange give them dua tawiz.

I shot the hijras extensively in Mahim with the Chancawalli Rafaees and here at Ajmer.

Barsati Bawa was missing at Haji Malang this year.

Barsati Bawa and Handi were the only one that knew I was a Shia and I did Kamazani.. on Ashura and Chehlum..

Handi wanted me to become a rafaee sword piercing exponent he was the best I politely refused happy with what I dd for real year after year..on the streets during Moharam.

My kama matam I call Tandav on the Soul of Shimr or Dance of Death.. a Hindu metaphor in keeping with my cultural inheritance.

Hijra Bawas at Char Yar Ajmer

179,205 items / 1,408,838 views

This too was shot at Char Yar among the Hijra Bawas of Ajmer ...her life can be traced from the lines of pain on her face .. a poem without words I translated with depth of field of my camera lens.

Katle Hussain asal mein marge Yazeed hai

179,205 items / 1,408,837 views

This Hijra bawa moved me intensely with her thoughts on Imam Hussain and for me whatever he gender ambiguity whatever the views of Muslims even Shais against Hijras I am a slave of anyone who is a slave of Hussain..I would bow my head wherever Hussain is written, and it is not just the Mullah who talks about Hussain even Hindus talk and eulogize Hussain and his supreme sacrifice.

Mind you these are all old posts that via Exif data date change I have bought forward on my Flickr photo stream..



Katle Hussain asal mein marge Yazeed hai
Islam zinda hota hai har karbala ke baad

Ohh Shimar leyin zalim kya zulm kiya tu ne
Pyasa hi gala kata Pani na diya tu ne

Laash ayi jab Asghar ki Maan kehne lagi roo ke
Pyasa ki gala kata pani na diya tu ne

Wo kis ke nawase hai bhoke hai ya pyase hai
Itna bhi na socha mardood zara tu ne

Sar apna kataya itni bhi parwa na ki tu ne batil ki
Saabhaas tujhe Ae hud kya kaam kiya tu ne

Mar kar bhi kabhie zalim aaram na paye ga
Baagh-e-ghul Ahmad ko paamaan kiya tu ne

The Hijra Murid at Char Yar Aur Kya Ap Hijre Ho

179,205 items / 1,408,814 views

Hijra murids are disciple followers of the Hijra Bawas , hijra murids could be disciples of male bawas too ..this pretty hijra damsel took care of the Hijra bawas worldly needs pressed his legs, served him food and tea..
In return the Hijra Bawa blessed the murid and put in a good word of recommendation yo her Hjra Guru.

And the hijra murid could be a Hindu and the Hijra Bawa a Muslim did not matter on the soul of Hijra humanity.

And the Hindu hijras would listen in rapt attention to the narration of the Tragedy of Karbala and become one in pain..

Hijras are not bigots their motto is Sarv Dharm Ek which means all religion are one..and I have seen hijras in Mumbai at the 14 stations of the cross on Good Friday hands folded praying to the human Jesus who carries the Cross..at Vakola .

I have seen hijda pierce his mouth with a 18 feet rod from cheek to cheek for Goddess Maryamma at Sion Koliwada , and I have seen Hindu hijras beating their chests on Ashura day watching the Shias cutting their backs with swords in memory of Imam Hussain.

I have shot Hijras during Chehlum in Mumbai dressed in black and weeping as the Alam passed by .. so if a Shia thinks and feels I am a Hijra I think I am ..I am everything and nothing.. and I would rather be a Hijra than be a Muslim who does not know the contribution of Hussain to Islam .and when a Shia asks me

Kya Ap Hijre Ho

I am forced to answer to satisfy his bigotry

Jee Han Main Hoon..

The Hijra Murids Hijra Bawas and The Shia Blogger

179,205 items / 1,408,802 views

The colorful hijras at Char Yar with the white dressed Hijra Bawas are the Hijra Murids or patrons who come here smoke the chillum , and hijra bonding takes place...all around the hijra bawas are te other bawas and rafaees and malangs living in mutual gender harmony.

And at Haji Malang it is a bit different the Hijra Gurus from the various Hijra houses pool in and distribute food to everyone, this is known as Niyaz.

Everybody is fed no limitation eat as much as you want..

With The Hijra Bawas At Char Yar Ajmer

179,205 items / 1,408,792 views

Shooting the hijras and documenting their pain is what the crux of this blog is about..and I would wander barefeet shooting the hijras at Moti Katla or come here at Char Yar to sit with the Malangs and the bawas..and in some moments of madness I would sit with the hijra bawa listening to their tales...

I would shoot extensively manage a trip to Taragadh too, I wanted to visit the high priest of Pushkar with whom I have cordial relationships but time was too short and I never could makes this trip.

I dont know but it is strange every time Ajmer Urus comes I am in the worst financial straits with dark clouds looming on the horizon but somehow I make it to Ajmer and back..

Peersaab Fakhru Miya Hujra no 6 my host allows me to stay at his house and last year paid for my ticket to Mumbai.I am indebted to him his sons Farid Miya and Qambar Miya ..

The Hijda Bawas Sada Suhagin and the Shia Blogger

179,205 items / 1,408,770 views

This was shot in Ajmer Char Yar cemetery most of the bawas pass by here or sit around here among their individual groups..and this s the place for Bawa News , who expired who has replaced whom as Gaddi Nashin who has been excommunicated from a Rafaee group..

I was part of the Chancawalli Rafaees a group I documented from Mahim dargah, but it went on self splintering itself
till today it is just a few members after the death of Late Handi who died at Kota.

It was this group that bought me to the Chishtiya Sufi thought and than I met Peersaab Fakhru Miya Hujra No 6 and my visits to Ajmer Sharif began in earnest.

The Most Powerful Hijda Bawa of Ajmer

130,315 items / 969,037 views

The most respect hijda bawa that I met she too was a follower of Imam Hussain and I saw that Karbala the Martyrdom of Imam Hussain was what kept their philosophy of life alive.

It was this aspect of their meditation their celibacy their asceticism that provoked me to sit and listen to the and shoot them extensively.. and even my visits to Ajmer Sharif began because of the words on the wall of the Shrine.. \

Shah ast Hussain, Badshah ast Hussain
Deen ast Hussain, Deen Panah ast Hussain
Sardad na dad dast, dar dast-e-yazeed,
Haqaa key binaey La ila ast Hussain

Loosely translated

Ruler is Hussain, Emperor is Hussain,
Faith is Hussain , guardian of faith is Hussain .
Offered his head and not the hand to Yazid.
Truly, the mirror of faith is Hussain

raza rumi

The Barefeet Bawa of The Cybernet And The Hijras

179,205 items / 1,408,658 views

This was shot at Haji Malang a mountainous trek on foot , I climb barefeet leaving my ego at the foot of the Malangad mountains so to speak.

It is a tough climb for me as I am a diabetic asthmatic but I reach the top it takes me about 3 and a half hours , I shoot people and I go through varying emotions as I climb my way towards the Holy Shrine.

The beggars the stall keepers vendors all know me , I am called the camerewale bawa ..by the locals and other bawas too.

I have had strange experiences dreams and it has been fulfilling to say the least , firsyly I would not reach Haji Malang if the Malang Bawa did not call me , this is his territory his rules his dictates prevails he gives but never takes back.. may sound strange but it is true.

So my tryst with Haji Malang is my tryst with faith and my inner spirituality I am a believer of Ali and Hussain and this embedded on the dome of the Holy Shrine too.


I come here live with the Ketkar brothers Kumar and Abhijit and this was made possible by Sakib my florist friend from Mahim.

I could live with my hijra guru Laxmi Narayan Tripathi and though she is hospitable I stay with the Ketkars they feed me , they dont charge me a penny this is their generosity and I am forever indebted to them..they know I come here in peace I shoot I go away.

What I shot is memories kept alive on the internet courtesy Flickr .

Almost everyone knows me at Haji Malang unless he is come there for the first time, I document the hijra connection between them and the Holy Shrine.

The main reason why hijras visit shrines like Ajmer Sharif and Haji Malang.. is primarily they are not treated as outcasts , they are not the untouchables here , and they are respected even if they are commercial workers from red light areas , they come here feed the poor , and are No1 devotees of bnoth the Holy Saints.

Khwajah Gharib Nawaz is their Ann Datta , their provider they leave everything come to him , he protects them he gives them multifold..they also give their earnings to him.. they pay for poor children , they pay for old homes and they do abundant charity I know and a few khadims know too..
They get young girls from poor homes married they pay for the sick and their hospitalization stay..


This is one side of hijra humility generosity charity one never hears , because what the public wants to know is more to do with the hijras exotic hybrid sexuality than anything else.

So I decided to show you the positive side of the hijras , my hijras are human very beautiful gorgeous larger than life and more womanly than their women counterparts.


They have created voluptuous fruits on their barren trees of life..and they are sough after.. they have it they flaunt it.. I see it I shoot it.

As a blogger who documents hijras I shoot them on three levels , the alpha male metrosexual hijra rich famous , maybe a courtesan , an escort a body guard for rich mafia types, the bar dancer..

Than the next in order are the Hijra Bawas that I have already shown you , they are esoteric society within the laws of hijra secrecy life and death.

Finally the hijra beggars the lowest of the lot and beneath them the hijra prostitutes of Peela House Shukljai Street Foras Road and Kamatipura Gully No1.

I have shot the hijras at Peela House and Kamatipura Gully No1.the mujra dance hijra live here too.. I am close to Zeenath Guru of Hijra Gully no1.

Than there are the Devdasi hijras the hijras that beg on the trains local and far bound.

The only place that I have not yet shot that eludes me is Koovagam in Villupuram where the Eunuch festival takes place at the Koothandavar Hijra temple.Lord Iravan has not called me as yet and I shall go when I am called.

In the meantime I shoot the hijras at the Holy Shrines and on the streets.

I met them this evening too,, our paths are crossed Kya Ap Hijre Ho.. I dont think you need to be a hijra to shoot hijras .. Fuck what a stupid fucked question from a dickhead who follows the same religiosity that I do only thing he is a better Shia than I am.. this is thanks to his surroundings his ancestral heritage his parentage which is perhaps is million times better than mine.

I shoot humanity as it reflects itself on the parched soul of my camera lens.. from within and without.

ps
The fogging smoke in the picture was divine intervention touching the hijra and me and blissfully blessing us both biological male but with two different perspectives of sexuality..

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